So far, so funny

I'm not even IN nursing school yet, just in the prereq's, but so far I've had a few funny moments and I imagine it's only going to get better. The best stories involve genitalia because let's face it: People are goofy about sex and/or genitals.

Story 1: Instructor is telling her students in Nurses Aide class that we should practice various skills on as many people as we can: blood pressure, pulse, respirations, etc. She says we should find a man who'll let us shave him. A classmate bursts out in disgust, "What? down THERE?"

Story 2: We are working on dummies. We realize our female dummy is anatomically correct so of course someone decides to check out the male. Except he has nothing but a patch of velcro. Turns out his genitals are velcro-removable and locked in a cabinet because people kept doing evil things to him. I have named said dummy "Bobbitt."

Story 3: Right after that, we were practicing measuring things to the CC. We had a urinal, because we didn't have enough pitchers. A classmate picked it up and said, "This is a funny looking pitcher. " We explained that it wasn't a pitcher but a bedpan. "Huh?" was the response. Another woman gently explained that it was a men's bedpan but was met with another "huh?" Finally it was bluntly said, "You put his winky in here and he pees" at which point the confused one DROPPED the pitcher and said, "I'm not doing that! I'm not touching a man there!"
uh...yeah, you're getting into Nursing. You're gonna have to.

Story 4: I had a lab partner for our first day in Anatomy and Physiology. Our assignment was to make people out playdough and practice various cuts and views (transverse, saggital, etc.). Of course we couldn't help but make anatomically correct playdough people! I'm particularly proud of my pregnant playdough person, in whom I drew a baby once I cut her open and exposed her yellow clay insides. Not so impressive was our she-male.

Story 5: Same lab partner, same day. We are labeling the regions of the body. The instructor is going over what each region is called. Arrow 8 points to our little male sketch's penis. She repeats several times that the area is the pubis. It does not fail, however, that the person sitting next to my partner is obviously a dingbat and not paying attention. She raises her hand in complete and utter cluelessness and asks, "What is #8? What should we write for #8?" I hear my partner mutter, "Just write pee-pee."